My trip is over. But the adventure is just beginning.

It's my last day in Ho Chi Minh. It's my last day in Vietnam. It's my last day in Asia. My trip is over... but the adventure is not. In fact, it's just beginning.

I get 3 weeks to spend with the people I love and appreciate in an amazing city called San Francisco. I get to go home and spend time with my family. And the happy ending to my story - I get to move to New York City with the man I fell in love with. 

I get a clean slate. I can be whoever I want to be in New York. I can take whatever career path I choose. I get to create a new circle of friends. 

I'm back at the jazz club. I can see, feel, smell, and taste the band's passion for playing jazz. It's that evident. I want to be a turned on woman that lives with this kind of passion. I sit back and close my eyes.. and I smile as the band starts to play 'what a wonderful world'... 

Playing in ho chi minh

I'm scared. There is a crowd watching me. I'm sweating profusely. And my manicure is ruined. I'm secretly hoping the harness I'm wearing was not made in Vietnam. I reach for the top of the wall, smack it to show the crowd Ive made it to the top, and gently sit back onto the harness with a death grip on the rope (you know, in case anything breaks). I'm scared of heights.
90 meters down Dao gives me the thumbs up and in 3 seconds my feet touch the ground. There is no slow and steady belaying in Vietnam. He dropped me like a rock and I stood up, laughed, and asked Hau which route I should do next.

I'm at the first-ever rock climbing gym in Vietnam. There is a team of three guys assisting me: Dao -  he belays for me.. and I think the only English he knows is 'on belay' (which is the ready signal to start climbing). Hau - he ties me in and picks which route I'll do next. His English is pretty good and he helps me to figure out how to climb a route as I'm going up (ie most strategic place to put my hands and feet). And there is the last guy.. who's name I didnt understand. And nor did I understand anything else he was saying. He was my cheerleader. 

Apparently women don't rock climb in Vietnam so there is a growing crowd of people watching me. I'm trying not to be embarrassed.

An hour of climbing is exhausting - especially when you're not belaying for anyone.. just climbing over and over again. I wanted to do one last route. My arms are shaking and I'm halfway up the wall. I'm exhausted. My hands hurt. Like stinging and burning hurt. Voice in my head tells me to shut up and push harder. I climb a few more meters and catch my breath. I wipe the sweat off my face and I can see why my hands hurt so bad. I'm bleeding. Everywhere. 

I'm bummed. how am I supposed to go to yoga later?!

I get bandaged up, thank the team, and head off for more adventures. I duck into a high end department store (in search of air conditioning) and find there is bowling and arcade games on the 4th floor. I'm a sucker for arcades. I head up and grab a snack at the bar.

I have no idea how much the video games cost but they have House of the Dead- ALL four versions of it. I conclude I'm going to be here awhile and buy $6 worth of tokens. Which is apparently so many tokens the guy has to find a plastic bag for me.

30 minutes later I have:
1. used about 10 cents worth of my tokens
2. realized that girls don't play arcade games in Vietnam, especially shooting ones, so I have another crowd around me. 

A Vietnamese tiger woods-look alike asks me if I want a partner in my two-player game. I laughed, and played House of the Dead with (a name that sort of sounds like) Vincent - who lives in Atlanta but is in Vietnam visiting family. He wasn't that good at House of the Dead, so I thanked him, left him with $5 worth of tokens, and headed off for more adventures - a cooking class. 

Except the they won't do a class unless there are two or more people (damn traveling solo!). so I conclude that I smell awful and go back to my hotel - which happens to have one of the nicest spas in Ho Chi Minh.

In theory, a coconut body scrub is a great idea. In reality, it just makes your mouth water for the entire duration of your spa service. When it was time to rinse off - I looked like I had been running around naked in the snow. HAHA! Got a massage and decided I still needed more pampering. 

Headed down the street to a recommended salon and thought: I don't know which will be scarier - rock climbing or letting someone in Vietnam cut my hair. 

I walked in and was greeted with some faaaabulous English-speaking Vietnamese divos. Perfect.

I have a new 'do. I dont know how I feel about it but my divo hair stylist claims: 'I make you very attractive!!' 

maybe he's right. for a guaranteed good meal I've come back to the nice restaurant I ate at the other evening and several gentleman have asked me to join their table. I guess I could use some company to toast my last night in Asia! turns out they are three architects from England and Australia living in Hong Kong. We had dinner together and toasted to my trip!

Making it feel like a vacation

my crazy 2 month trip is coming to a close. at times it's been a crazy adventure. or a life learning experience. or physically demanding. and sometimes it's been hell. I've decided I'm going to end it as a relaxing vacation. it hasn't always felt like a vacation- so I thought I'd kick off that idea by skipping my already paid for tour and going to a day spa.

I was going for a long walk down the main drag in mui ne and found the highly recommended spa I had been reading about. I realized I didn't have enough cash on me so I had a motorbike taxi scoot me back to my luxury apartment, wait for me, and then drive me back - all for 2 bucks. 

Armed with $32 I did the 2.5 hour package - deep tissue massage, facial, and mani/pedi. I asked them to do it in 2 hours so I could make it to yoga in time.. and they were happy to accommodate. however, this meant getting a facial while getting a deep tissue massage. I lay on my back getting my legs beaten up (yes I love that kind of a massage) while my face was gently rubbed and cleansed. it was ridiculous. I had a hard time keeping a straight face... and I'm sure they did too. at one point my face was wrapped in aloe while someone is making the lower half of my body do acrobatics (ie stretching was part of the massage). I should have had them take a picture.

after my mani/pedi dried.. I thanked the team of four people for making me beautiful and getting me out on time. tipping isn't expected and I tipped them 20% because honestly.. they deserved it... then walked to yoga with my bright pink nails.

said goodbye to the beach and headed back to the madness of ho chi minh... where the smell of shit and sound of horns and motorbikes fills the air. wonderful.

had such a bad headache checking into my (supposedly) five star hotel. took me three hours to get them to sort things out - but in the end I'm comfortably setup in the 'governor suite'. No it doesn't make sense that I have two bathrooms and a separate living room... but my room is right next to the gym. so in my head it makes sense.

let go. accept and take your journey.

it's 85 degrees out and I have goose bumps. I'm sitting across from Lex- a gorgeous Aussie I just did a yoga class with in Mui Ne, Vietnam. Were sipping protein shakes and talking about the journeys our lives are taking... and it's giving me the chills.

His journey: a financial investor from Australia who gave up everything he had, traveled the world practicing yoga, then opened his own gym and yoga studio in mui ne, Vietnam. he's in his 30s, he's made the jump, and he's happy. the kind of 'happy' that fills a room and makes you wish you could put it in your pocket when he's not looking and take it home with you. 

as he unraveled the story of his journey he leans forward and with an intense look in his eyes says: 'sometimes we need to just let go. we need to let go of expectations to be able to receive what the world has to give us'.

thats a loaded statement.

To embrace our journey is to truly live and become alive. no more wondering 'what if'. no more waiting for things to come to you. follow your dreams, take your journey. the universe will come together to help you. I am living proof of this. 

By 'journey' I am not referring to some hippie and granola concept. no I have not grown dreadlocks on this trip.. and nor have I been smoking anything (except all the motorbikes that I whizz past on my mountain bike. booyaa!). by journey I mean your dream. or dreams. If you could be doing anything in the world right now- what would it be? everyone dreams and everyone has an answer to that.

do more of the things that make you happy. and less of the things that make you unhappy. 

Its that simple.

I think of my mom and the transformation I've seen her go through in the last few months. she retired and became a nanny for my nephew. I have never seen her so happy. Nikko brings her so much joy and I get teary eyed just thinking about how happy she is.  

life is beautiful. I'm thankful to lex for sharing his yoga practice with me and re-inspiring me. Vietnam had me down for a bit. but I'm a turned on woman again. my last days here will be spent celebrating. celebrating the jump I've made, celebrating the journey I'm on, celebrating the love I have in my life, and celebrating the 4th of July. cheers!

I miss America

We live in a great country. one worth celebrating. it's always fun to BBQ and watch fireworks on the 4th. but  this is the first time in my life that I wanted to be home to celebrate my country. I'm lucky to be an american citizen and being on this trip really makes me love and appreciate where I'm from. I miss home. I miss the English language. I miss feeling safe in a non-corrupted place. I miss clean food standards. I miss drinking water from the tap. I miss flush toilets and toilet paper. I miss driving on the right hand side of the road ... and in actual lanes. I miss the music. I miss my country.. my friends.. my family.. my boyfriend. 

Really embracing the 'alone' thing.

I woke up this morning and laughed at myself. Last night after jazz I walked to meet Sho and Mike at a club not too far away. I knew they were coming sometime between 1030 and 1130 so I'd be clubbing solo .. which has been done before on many occasions (just not in Vietnam).  I don't think there was a single Vietnamese person at the club and I concluded that every white person was kidnapped from their nice hotel and deposited into this club. The DJ was spinning something amazing... like old school James brown funk.. with ultra lounge house.. and an occasional pitbull beat. Found a spot on the dance floor, closed my eyes, and danced the night away with myself. Later on found my friends who wanted to go to another club. when I told Sho I was going to stay here solo he looked at me and gave me an astonished 'really?!' and really... I did. and had a great time partying with myself! 

managed to sleep in, did a yoga class, and reeeeelaxed with a 90 minute massage before getting in a private car headed to better scenery in mui ne. 

it's pouring rain in mui ne. the kind of downpour that threatens to kill my iPhone if I go outside. I'm sitting in a wonderful art cafe with a salad and shiraz by candlelight... because the power is out.  I'm overwhelmed with happiness. the last week+ has been rough on me. I checked myself into a luxury resort apartment owned by a sweet Russian couple Vaughn and Sharon. my apartment is huge, modern, air conditioned, poolside, has a full fridge filled with wine, beer and ice cream, there is free laundry service and breakfast, and my huge plasma tv turns into a computer. I don't know what else I could ask for. the kicker... I somehow negotiated this $100+/night room down to $40... over email. yeeaaa boooiiii.

the owner of the cafe, Joe, comes over with free peach shooters since the power is out. usually I'd opt out, but since this cafe is across the street from my apartment and I'm surrounded by white people.. I dont think it gets much safer than that.

Ho Chi Minh ... again.

It was raining when the plane landed in Ho Chi Minh. Spent the afternoon trying to shake the 'yuck' I've been feeling. Paid 200,000 dong ($10) to go to the gym (which is a lot in Vietnam.. but worth every dollar). Apparently women do not lift weights in Vietnam so I created quite a stir in the weight room. Didn't matter because I didnt understand anything the guys were trying to say to me. Took a ... bizarre.. yoga class afterwards. but I loved it- especially when the instructor would count the reps (btw there are no 'reps' in yoga - hence the 'bizarre').. anyway, he didn't know all the numbers. 'thirteen, fourteen, eighteen, twenty, twenty one, twenty three, twenty four, twenty five and rest'.

I'm sitting listening to a fantastic set at a jazz club (yes I am on my iPhone at a jazz club. it prevents the guy at the bar next to me from starting a conversation. I'm tilting my phone in hopes he's reading over my shoulder).  I've just eaten at a very expensive restaurant (romantic dinner with myself).. and I'm glad to be leaving the city scene soon... mui ne (ie beach town) tomorrow! 

still wishing for better days in Hanoi/Halong Bay

There is one highlight today: kayaking around halong bay. Besides the trash.. everywhere in the water... and the rain, and the rude guy that ripped me off on this kayak.. its fun. 

It's a long ways back to Hanoi. I'm excited to get the hell out of halong. Booked myself an expensive hotel room in Hanoi and took a bubble bath with the jets on (and lil weezy blaring in the background) as soon as I checked in. and my room comes with a laptop. sigh of relief.

Watched a water puppet show.. I keep hearing 'you haven't experienced Vietnam unless you've been to a water puppet show'. It was.. weird. The highlight was a crazy one string instrument a woman played. In all... I'll just say I'm glad it was 45 minutes because I may have killed someone if it was any longer. 

and cruised around the nice market sporting a new look

Too much rice wine at a restaurant and Sho and Mike tried to assign me a new boyfriend who serenaded me with Vietnamese songs for the remainder of the evening. the kind of serenading where he held my hand to his heart while singing at the top of his lungs with his eyes clothes. wow

wishing for better days in Hanoi/Halong Bay

It's 8am, I've slept 3 hours, and the bus is late to pick us up for our halong bay tour. Vietnam doesn't have the same kind of tour service as the other countries. You pay less and you can expect a lot less. It's more of a 'I wonder how bad this is going to be' type of experience with every tour I've been on in Vietnam. This one delivers as promised - bad, with a side of everything-is-too-crowded, and a touch of 'why-are-we-standing-and-waiting-again?'. ah Vietnam. I don't know if it's lack of sleep and I'm cranky or if Vietnam really is just... 

It's raining. The bus ride is long. We stand forever at the crowded dock before were herded onto a crappy boat and fed a crappy lunch. Everyone on the boat is over 60. Sho and Mike buy a bottle of cheap whiskey to ease the dreariness and I proceed to read 1,394,849 pages of my book.. while striking an asian pose

We go to an amazing cave.. made awful by bright blue, yellow, purple, and pink lights. It didn't look natural.. and it was a shame. So we drank a beer instead.

We arrived at cat ba island. I expected the worst. it's bad, but not as bad as I thought. we check into a hotel in which tripadvisor users absolutely hate. the power goes out. splendid.

we roam the streets looking for something to do. it's an eerie scene. there are people standing outside- everywhere. hundreds and hundreds of people- spilling into the streets. all Vietnamese. I'm tired of following around the boys. I'm not looking to get drunk and nor am I looking for girls. I find a handsome Frenchman my age named Pierre and he tags along and keeps me company with his travel stories.

If I could click my heels three times and be home I would. I'm getting tired of Vietnam. In the last 36 hours the locals are rude, I'm getting ripped off by every vendor, Ive been staying in awful hotels and not sleeping, and I haven't had a meal that looked appetizing.

click click click.

damn still here.

hacky sack in Hanoi with Sho

No city is like the other in Vietnam. The people are different, the vibe is different, the shops are different, the prices are different, the food is different.

After meeting a college friend, Sho, and his med school friend, Mike, at the Hanoi airport we jumped in a cab and were dumped off into the middle of madness. Motorbikes, street food, narrow streets and a humming energy was what I was breathing in Hanoi. 

We bought tickets for halong, checked into a shitty hotel, and went on a walking exploration. 

If you mix hacky sack with the 'birdie' from badminton you get some kind of weird kicking game they play in Vietnam. I bought a birdie and we got to kicking it in the park. Some of the locals joined us and we played until we were drenched in sweat.

Nothing else to write home about in Hanoi. It's aiiiite here. I've been here 5 hours and I'm ready to leave.